Labor & After Practicalities (what to wear, supplies, etc.)

[warning: some content may be graphic and not appropriate for male readers or those who don't want to be scared off from having children :) -- read at your own risk]

Here was the question: "what did you wear to the hospital during labor? what do you recommend? any other suggestions about what worked for you at the hospital and at home would be helpful."

First of all, it doesn't really matter what you wear during labor, just make sure you're comfortable. And there is always the possibility of what you are wearing getting ruined, so don't wear your favorite outfit. I prefer to wear sweats or comfy shorts (depending on the weather), a t-shirt or some comfy shirt, and slip on shoes. As soon as you get to the hospital they will make you put on a gown anyway, which is actually nice because it is loose and doesn't get in the way as much as normal clothes.

[as a side note, when packing for the hospital, err on the side of less stuff. with my first baby, I followed one of those silly lists of stuff to take, only to find that I used about 5% of what all I brought. the stuff I use are slippers, my bathroom stuff like a toothbrush, an outfit to wear home, an outfit for baby to wear home, your baby book/journal to write in, maybe some extra snacks, the carseat for the way home, and that's about it]

While some people like to have their own robe or clothes for the hospital after birth, I prefer to stay in the hospital gown. Most people are still bleeding and making messes those first few days, so it is safter to wear their gown that you won't mind ruining. Also, it is actuallly easier for breastfeeding to have the gown on than normal clothes or a robe.

In fact, I don't think a robe would be helpful for breastfeeding. It tends to get in the way more than help. What you need for breastfeeding are some good nursing bras and nursing pads (see earlier post on nursing pads). Medela makes some nice nursing bras for after labor because they are comfy on your sore boobs. Then I would just wear my normal clothes over a nursing bra.

Also, you will probably be wearing your maternity clothes for a little while after your baby is born. I don't know about other women's experiences, but I have my early maternity clothes, then my later maternity clothes for when I am bigger. Then after the baby is born, I go back to wearing my early maternity clothes for awhile (although sometimes the first few days after birth I am still wearing my later maternity clothes). In fact, it has been four months since my last baby was born, and I am still wearing some of my early maternity pants sometimes. I only have a few pairs of pre-pregnancy pants I can fit into at this point. Not only is there the expanded blubber on the belly, our hip bones usually expand in pregnancy and it takes some time for them to go back to our original size.

Okay, so here's my list of supplies for after you come home from giving birth:
-nursing bras
-nursing pads
-maxi-pads
-underwear you don't mind ruining
-a squirt bottle, tucks pads, and no-sting pain relief spray (you will be using all of this in the hospital, so just have them stock you up before you go home)
-a waterproof mattress pad for YOUR bed, you'll see why later
-Lanisoh ointment for your nipples
-people to help you!

I think that's it. But if anyone can think of something I'm forgetting, please leave a comment and I'll add it!

Baby's Packing List (for trips with your little bundle)

*first of all, one of the most amazing things about children is that the smaller they are, the more stuff you seem to have to carry! So, newborns will likely require more than a one year old, and by 18 months you should not need to take the majority of this stuff on a trip. By two years old, all you really need is their clothes, a bib, and some sippy cups! (Oh, but don't forget the diapers and wipes for most toddlers, often they aren't going to be potty trained for several months or more)

So, hopefully some of you find this list helpful. I always pull it out when I am going somewhere and check things off to make sure I've remembered everything. It can get extremely difficult to not forget something without a list when there is so much to remember with babies!

Baby’s Packing List

Pack n’ Play
Quilt
Blankets
Swing/Chair (obviously optional)
Lap Pads
Diapers
Wipes
Burp cloths
Boppy
Nursing pads & bras
Detergent (if you want your free & clear baby detergent to do laundry with)
PJs
Day outfits
Onesies
Beanies
Socks
Rattle/toys/books
Sling/baby carrier
Portable or blow-up baby bathtub (or when the baby can sit up on his or her own, I take one of those big bear sponges to just put in a regular bathtub to keep them from slipping)
Towels
Washcloths
Cleansing cloths/soap
Camera
Bibs
Cereal/other food
Bowls/spoons
Bottles
Pump (optional)
Teething toys
Baby monitor (I often find this to be one of the most helpful things I take places)
Pacifiers
Any special stuffed animals/books you may need for bedtime, etc.

Tummy Time!

For those of you who already have babies, you probably already know about tummy time. It is one of those things that you should be doing that is sometimes hard to remember to do...especially with the second, third, fourth, fifth child!

For those of you who are pregnant or new moms, maybe you don't know what I am talking about yet, so let me share.

"Tummy time" is the phrase development specialists use to refer to time your baby spends on his or her tummy! (not too complicated there) It is an important aspect of your baby's development for them to have this time spent on his or her tummy, because it helps them develop their neck muscles, then their torso, their arms, and finally their legs. This time spent on their tummy is what will eventually get them to the developmental milestone of rolling over and then eventually crawling.

Even newborns can have "tummy time", but it looks different than what a three-month old can handle. A newborn baby's tummy time consists more of the time they spend on their tummy against mom or dad's chest, or from time to time against our laps or knees. After a month or two though, you can begin to put your little one on the floor on his or her tummy with either a towel, a Bobby, or some other soft prop-up device (there are several of these types of things made specifically for tummy time). Then after another few months, baby can handle being on his or her own on the floor. But usually during the first four or five months they don't like to be stuck on their stomachs for too long. Usually about five to ten minutes is all most babies can handle.

Putting a prop-up mirror or some other toy in front of them on the blanket when they are on the floor is a great way to help them enjoy this time on their tummies. Eventually they will begin pushing themselves up farther and holding their heads up, at which point this position will usually become a little more enjoyable for babies.

But I encourage you all to take time to incorporate this into your little one's day, even from when they are first born. It is such a privilege to get to watch your baby develop from a tiny infant who can't even control his or her own arms and legs, into finally a little walking and one day talking toddler.

Setting Up a Diaper Changing Area

As requested, here is my advice on how to set up a diaper changing area for your little one.

First, choose your area, which can be anything from a real changing table you purchase (though I don't really advise this because it is not a very useful piece of furniture after your baby gets bigger) to a dresser or file cabinet with a sturdy top.

Second, gather your supplies. There is a variety of supplies marketed for diaper changing, but here would be my recommended list of what to have.
1. a changing pad
2. 2-3 changing pad covers
3. 4-8 lap pads (small water-proof thick pads)
4. diapers
5. wipes
6. a spray bottle
7. very soft papertowels (Viva brand works well) &/or cotton squares (for newborns)
8. diaper ointment
9. talc-free baby powder (optional - I like Burt's Bees Baby Bee powder)
10. lotion for after baths (I only use this on older babies though)
10. a diaper pail
(I also recommend putting your laundry basket and trash can close by the changing area for easy disposal of things)

Third, you set it all up! Here's how I do it.
I put the changing pad cover on the changing pad, and then place usually two lap pads down covering the area where the baby will lay. This is for your first line of defense against poop and pee, so that if it gets on stuff or if your baby starts going while your changing him/her, all you have to do is throw the lap pad in the laundry and lay another one down. This is much easier than having to change the changing pad cover everytime.

With newborns, I recommend using the cotton squares and papertowels with water sprayed on them instead of wipes. Even the most sensitive wipes have chemicals in them that can be harsh on newborn skin.

Some people put diaper creme/ointment or powder on their babies all of the time. I only really use this on red bottoms to prevent a more serious diaper rash. Sometimes I'll use the powder on my younger baby's bottom if it is a little red or seems to be staying too damp from all of her rolls! This can create diaper rash or heat rash, which can be prevented with the use of powder.

Also, using some sort of hanging organizer is very helpful as a way to store all of this stuff close by. And make sure to put the wipes in a place that is VERY accessible!

Any questions? Happy Diapering!

Some of My Labor Tips

Something that makes this post difficult to write is that every woman's labor is so different, and even the same woman's labor from baby to baby can be very different. You really never know what to expect. I've known people who've had labors that last days, and then others who go into labor all of a sudden and then have their baby three hours later. Both of these are extremes, and the more common scenario is that you would have a longer early stage of labor, followed by several hours of more intense labor, an hour or two of pushing, and then the delivery. I believe the average time for a first labor is about 12-24 hours. My first was 24 hours long almost exactly, and my second was 7 hours. But it tends to be better to psyche yourself up for a fairly long labor, and to be prepared for the long haul. So, here's some tips...

For early labor:

*Try to eat if you can, and eat foods high in energy and easy on the stomach. Some good ideas are energy bars, yogurt, and honey.
*Take advantage of this time and get things ready to go to the hospital before it is too late and you are too out of it to pack a bag. Also, take a shower, which will make you feel better and can help your labor progress. You can also get in the bathtub as long as your water hasn't broken.
*Walk around, but also conserve your energy. You may have a long road ahead and should stay active, yet take time to rest in between.
*Drink lots of water

As the labor picks up:

*You can begin to walk around more if you have enough energy, it can really help your labor to progress
*Drink lots of water (especially if you want to avoid getting an IV)
*Use a variety of laboring positions, such as:
--sitting on a "birth ball" (one of those big inflatable exercise balls)
--leaning against a chair or bed
--on your hands and knees on the floor or on a bed
--on the toilet
--leaning against your husband or other labor help (you can do this walking too)

Try these different positions throughout your labor and you'll soon find one or two that work the best for you. But try to change positions and get up and walk a little every 30 minutes or so. This helps progress your labor and also helps get your mind off of the pain.

*Use pain relief techniques, such as:
--breathing deeply and slowly, deep moaning
--rocking your hips back and forth
--the hip squeeze (have your husband or labor helper squeeze your hips together from behind) -- this especially helps if you're having back labor
--rocking forward and back either on the birth ball or on your hands and knees

For Pushing:
--remember to breathe often during this stage, you can use both quick short breaths during pushes, and then in between contractions, take longer, deeper breaths

I'm going to add more to this soon!

Natural Childbirth

Sorry it has been so long since I wrote anything everyone! Life often gets busy as I am sure you all know!

Anyway, I've been wanting to put some stuff on here about natural childbirth, so here are some of my thoughts about it all!

I have labored and delivered both of my children without the use of any drugs (although I did have to take tylenol with Samuel because I had a fever:), and I loved my experience of natural childbirth. But before I get into it all, let me first say that I by no means look down on anyone who chooses to use drugs or pain relief. It is a choice we all have to make, and I have a good friend who loves having her babies with the help of an epideral, another friend who had her first naturally (with 44 hours of labor), and then had an epidural for her second. So, if you have had children with the help of modern medicine's pain relief, more power to ya. But I would like to write about some of the reasons why I think having a baby naturally is a great choice to make...and to share some of my experiences.

First of all, there is always an element of risk when it comes to having a baby...all sorts of things can happen during the labor and delivery. But I believe there is less of a risk when choosing to go through labor and delivery as naturally as possible. I really believe that our bodies are made to be able to handle this process without too much intervention. While I have had my children in the hospital, I am one of those people that most nurses don't like to work with, because I am basically trying to have a home birth in a hospital. I bring in my own doulas (which are kind of like midwives, except they don't deliver the baby), I am a bit resistant to a lot of the procedures they want to put me through (I hate laboring lying down, so I am kind of difficult to get good heart beat readings on the baby), I work pretty hard to convince them to not put an IV in me (or even a hep-lock for that matter, which is like a pre-IV). But my point is not to recommend being a difficult patient. My point is that I appreciate the safety and accommadations a hospital provides for having babies, but I really believe that we as women can pretty much undergo this process without much help from modern medicine.

Here's a good example of even the medical community starting to pick up on this. It used to be a common procedure for doctors to give women in labor an enema to clean them out so they didn't poop during labor. Finally they realized that most women's bodies do this naturally during early labor, and it wan't necessary to give these. They also realized that even if a woman poops during labor or even during the pushing stage, it isn't a big deal. Childbirth is messy, and pooping during it is the least of our worries!

So, back to why I promote natural childbirth... There is certainly the element of empowerment that comes from going through this process. It is an amazing thing to experience giving birth to your children, and I for one wouldn't really want to miss out on much of this. Our society runs from pain, but pain is not necessarily as bad of a thing as we've made it out to be. Especially this pain that means that something good is happening, a baby is coming, and your body is doing what it is supposed to be doing. With Samuel I had to have an episiotomy (where they cut you a little), because they needed to get him out very quickly (his heart rate had dropped significantly). Because of this, I missed the infamous "ring of fire." Not that I was complaining, but I appreciated experiencing this when I had Hope, since I missed out on it with my first labor. There is just something about experiencing the whole thing with your body fully feeling and experiencing every aspect of labor.

But I know that getting to fully experience all of the feelings and pain of childbirth is not a great reason for "going natural." I'm sure that wouldn't have been a convincing enough reason for me either. I think some of the clenchers for me were these facts...when you get an epidural, you can't walk, you have to get a catheter put in, you can't really feel the urge to push (and usually have to be coached through it a lot more), it can put your baby in danger, your chance for a c-section increases, and other risks that there is only a slight chance of happening. I hated the idea of not being able to get up and move around during labor, and of not being able to walk for a few hours after either. For some people, getting an epidural can speed up the labor, but I've also heard several horror stories of it slowing people's labor down, so then they will give you pectosin to speed it up, and then you can start to feel the pain again, so they up the medicine in the epidural, and there can be a vicious cycle created.

I don't want to get into all the risks involved or bad things that can happen if you have an epidural. That is something you can research on your own if you want. But for me, knowing that there were risks involved scared me away. But I have also known many women who've had great experiences in labor having epidurals. Some women choose to take advantage of some of the other pain reducing drugs available during childbirth. However, I've heard that these can be more dangerous to the baby because they go through your blood stream and go to the baby. On that note, most medicine does affect your baby in some way or another, even an epidural. It tends to make them come out a little less alert, and can interfere with their ability to nurse in those first few hours. During the first hour after childbirth is usually when the baby is the most alert and the most receptive to nursing. After that, they usually like to sleep for a few hours.

Okay, last point for now... I would definitely not consider myself a very tough person. Most people would say I have a very low pain tolerance in fact. When I stub my toe, it hurst like heck. But still, I have loved getting to go through the process of childbirth and be able to experience it all. There are so many natural things we can do to help with the pain, and going through the whole process of labor and delivery all culminates in the wonderful birth of your child. While I know this is something enjoyed so richly by women whether they are on any drugs or not, there is something amazing about undergoing something so intense and then experiencing that last push, just when you thought you couldn't do it anymore, when your baby comes out. It is a feeling of relief, joy, and a sense of overwhelming accomplishment unlike anything I've ever experienced before. To all of those women about to experience this for themselves: Happy Labor Day!

Some Breastfeeding Tips

Here are a few miscellaneous breastfeeding tips I wanted to share.

1. Be patient with the process when you first start out.
2. Use Lansinoh lanolin on your nipples to help with soreness. You can actually start putting it on your nipples during the last month or two of pregnancy, it helps prevent soreness when you first start breastfeeding.
3. Drink lots of water. Some people I know have had problems producing enough milk and it can be because they aren't keeping themselves hydrated. You get really thirsty when you're breastfeeding anyway, so this shouldn't be too hard to do. But here's a tip a nurse gave me -- keep a glass of water in every room when you first come home from the hospital so you get used to drinking lots and have it accessible everywhere!
4. Get lots of help from lactation consultants while in the hospital if they're available. Its best to learn as much as you can from them before you go home.
5. Make sure you learn the different feeding positions and how to get your baby latched on properly. A good latch is the key to comfortable and not painful breastfeeding.

I'll write more tips later...there are lots! Here's some good books on breastfeeding too if you want more information. There are actually tons of books on it, but here are some I am somewhat familiar with and can recommend.

Activity Guide

While this is a topic I still have a lot of growing to do in, I wanted to write a little post on it. As mothers we have a very important job to do in terms of our children's development and enjoyment of life. Sometimes with young children, it can be easy to get caught up in the daily business of life and forget that a big part of our job is to not just take care of our kids, but to invest in them. In other words, while we need to be diligent in the necessary care of our children (feeding them, dressing them, changing their diapers, etc.), we need to also be diligent in caring for them developmentally, emotionally, and socially. I often find it hard to make sure I am doing all of this part well! It often seems that making sure they are fed, somewhat clean, and dressed, plus all the work of managing a house, doing laundry, bills, etc. can take up all of our time.

Here are some of the activities I've found my children seem to love. Getting outside is a big one, because it is good for you too. Most kids LOVE getting to play outside, go to parks, the beach, etc. Samuel has a sandbox that he loves playing in, and kids also love any moving outside toys (a tricycle, rid-in car, etc.). If you live in a town like we do where there are lots of parks, I highly recommend taking advantage of this and exploring all the different parks with your children.

My kids are still a little young for arts and crafts, but even at 2 years old, Samuel is starting to enjoy the pleasures of coloring in a coloring book or "drawing" on plain white paper. Exploring the fun of markers, crayons, and pens is a great activity for children. As they get a little older, I really want to start to implement more creative arts and crafts that will also incorporate learning activities.

One of the best activities you can do with your children in my opinion is to read with them. Samuel's favorite "toys" are all of his books. I think one of the reasons for this is that he rarely watches T.V. I felt pretty strongly that not letting him watch T.V., even the baby videos, was important for his development. I am so thankful he enjoys reading and looking at books as much as he does. A lot of the words he can say he has learned through books. First Word books are great for this. Even infants can really benefit from books, and they usually love the cloth books. Then as they get older, the board books are great because they can't tear them.

Kids also love music and dancing. Playing music for them, or allowing them to explore a variety of musical instruments is another great activity. Dancing with them is always a favorite, even for infants. You can even make shakers for them out of plastic easter eggs and beans or rice. Just make sure you tape them well so the kids can't open them up and spill the contents everywhere (which can also be a choking hazard for younger kids).

Another activity that I think is really important for you to facilitate for your young children is to have them around other kids. It is very important that they learn how to interact with other children their age, and even to interact with children younger and older than them. They also have lots of fun being around other kids. This can sometimes take a lot of work for stay-at-home moms. But it is worth the effort. If you don't already know people with children your kids' ages, try to get involved in a mom's group through some organization. Lots of churches have this, and I know in Santa Barbara the city college (through Adult-Ed) has all sorts of "classes" that bring parents and children together for play times, etc.

Feeding Your Baby

Today I spent the afternoon at a friend's house who has a 10 month old baby, and we made a healthy apple bread that both her baby and my 2 year old loved. I also learned a lot of cool little healthy tricks for feeding infants. This was one of the things that was really hard for me with Samuel, my first baby...figuring out how to go from feeding him only breastmilk to feeding him everything we eat. It was rather baffling to me how to go about this process. I even got several books and asked the doctor and looked online, and nothing really could answer my questions. The Super Baby Food book is what I was really looking for but never found until my second child. I wish I had this book for my first baby. It is jam-packed with information on everything to do with feeding your baby and what to feed them when and how. It has lots of great recipes too. I'm going to try to start reading it and implementing the stuff in it with Hope (my 3 month old) when it comes time to start feeding her solids.



I plan on writing more about this topic as I experience it all again with Hope, so I don't want to give too many specifics right now. But I will say that getting lots of fruits and veggies and whole grains into your baby's diet is essential. I have loved learning a lot more about eating healthy and being able to feed Samuel healthy food. He has a great diet and eats a lot of healthy food, which is so enjoyable to watch. More on this topic later...